We all fall victim to it. We’re tired, we’re stressed out, we’re feeling hopeless – things like this (and more) can ultimately contribute to a gap in the ways we’re connecting to our partners.
At Arkansas Relationship Counseling, we know better than anyone what it’s like to fight feelings of complacency, unhappiness, and disconnection. More than that, though, we have a good idea of what you’re after. You want compassion, understanding, but more than anything, you want to feel reconnected and happy with your partner – more than anything, you want to remember how to keep that spark alive. Luckily, we can help. No matter what the reason, season, or problem, there’s always a way to work out the kinks in a stagnant, disconnected relationship. It just takes a little hard work and connection. Check out a few of our favorite things to help you and yours keep your spark alive!
Focus on Consistent Communication
It sounds strange to ask you to shift your attention toward communication – you probably think that’s what you’re doing all the time every single day, right? The short answer: kind of. The type of communication we hope you can learn to focus on involves paying close attention, owning up to your own communication shortcomings, and learning how to be flexible. Once you learn how to effectively communicate with your partner, you’ll be much better at knowing what keeps them interested and what helps keep your spark alive!
Don’t Forget About Fun
Sure, there are hundreds of technical exercises, ways to listen, and books you can read to help keep your romantic spark alive (and we encourage that), but you can’t forget to have fun! Do things with your partner that you both love to do. Is the weather beautiful outside? Use that to your advantage! Get adventurous, go hiking, go for a picnic, go kayaking! The opportunities are endless. Live in a snowy, winter wonderland? Go snowshoeing, go sledding, get into skiing, have a snowball fight – no matter where you are or what season you’re in, getting outside and adventurous can do wonders for rekindling that lost spark you two have.
Stay Curious (and Exciting!)
One of the best things you can do to keep your relationship’s spark alive? Be curious about your partner, and make sure that they have things to be curious about, too. Try to amp up the spontaneity, try a new and exciting activity together – whatever you do, shake those neurotransmitters up to shimmy off the repetitiveness of the relationship. Further, make sure you’re being curious about your partner – don’t just throw a routine “how was your day, honey?” at them without actually caring. Be curious. Understand them. Show them you’re genuinely interested.
Work on Your Relationship Together
We know what you’re about to ask – “does couples counseling work?” Take it from us, there’s nothing to be lost by taking the time to sit down with a mediator, work out your issues effectively, and attempt to figure out the root of any issues you might have. The marriage and relationship counselors at Arkansas Relationship Counseling believe that there are several things we can help teach you and your partner to learn how to work on your relationship together – it’s all about taking that first step.
Show Them How Much You Appreciate Them
This is going to look different for every couple – that’s where communication comes in. You want to make sure your partner knows that they’re loved and appreciated, these simple acknowledgments can do absolute wonders for adding a little spark to your romantic fire. Does your partner like gifts? Does your partner like physical assurance? Does your partner like a thoughtful note? Whatever it is and however they feel appreciated, make sure you’re letting them know they matter to you and that you care about their efforts in the relationship.
Take Care of Yourself & Encourage Your Partner to Do the Same
Do you really want to keep the spark alive? Make sure you and your partner are doing everything in your power to take care of yourselves. This goes for mentally, emotionally, and physically. Attraction exists in all of these realms, so ensuring that you’re in tip-top shape in every one of these is one of the quickest ways to relight that relationship fire.
Be Respectful
This is a huge one – so often, people let their spark die out because they think their partner doesn’t respect them. You want your relationship to improve? Be respectful. Stop being defensive, stop being passive-aggressive, stop stonewalling – listen to your partner, care about what they’re saying, and talk with them about what makes them feel respected.
At Arkansas Relationship Counseling Center, we can work with you and your partner to better establish how you can effectively communicate, work together, and learn how to keep your relationship alive and well. If you seek a happier, healthier, and overall, a more fun relationship with the person you love, know you’re not alone. Partnering with ARC won’t just help you get back to the lovey-dovey relationship you’ve been missing, we’ll help you take it further by teaching you how to express your thoughts, how to work together, and how to be the best couple you can be! Chat with us at (501) 222-3463 to learn more about how we can help you.
