Before becoming officially married, you and your partner must move beyond surface issues and dive into deeper conversation topics. Otherwise, your marriage may start off at a disadvantage.
When should you and your partner see a marriage counselor? Does couples counseling work? These are some questions you might find yourself answering before too long if you fail to properly plan before you tie the knot. Of course, relationship counselors can be a great compliment to any relationship, so going to marital counseling does not necessarily mean your relationship is on the outs. However, in general people seek it out after experiencing some problem. If you have the following five conversations before you tie the knot, though, you will most likely have a much healthier relationship overall.
Five Must Have Conservations Before You Tie the Knot
Money
Money makes the world, and many times a marriage go round. Therefore, you must have a long, detailed discussion about your income. Are you going to save anything from your earnings? What about donating to charities? Do not assume you will just “figure it out” later. This is a hot button topic that needs to be hashed out before walking the aisle.
Income Responsibilities
Piggybacking on the first conversation, you have to determine your long-term plan for who will work and how many hours. Where is your career path going? Will one of you stay home with kids in the future? If so, how will you plan for the loss of income? Will one or both of your careers demand long hours, days and weeks away from home or require a move across the country?
Do You Want Children?
Something else you have to address before getting married is whether or not you both want children and when you want to start a family. If one of you absolutely does not want kids at all and the other does, this can cause a lot of tension down the road.
Your Values and Religion
What do you each believe? What are your values and morals based upon? You might not care right now that your potential husband or wife does not believe as you do, but years down the road when it starts to affect how you spend your money or how your children are raised, this could be a significant issue. Get to the bottom of it before exchanging vows.
Conflict and When to See a Marriage Counselor
All relationships have some form of conflict. It is human nature. Therefore, you must determine how you will handle these inevitable disagreements before they arise.
Relationship counselors can walk you through the conversations above if you are unsure how to approach these crucial subjects. The important thing to remember is that a disagreement about one or more of these topics does not mean you cannot marry. It only means you have to discuss ahead of time how to deal with your differences. At Arkansas Relationship Counseling Center, we are happy to help you do just that. Contact us today by calling (501)-222-3463 to start your marriage off on the right foot.
